Multiple Personalities
by Psycho-Eff KittyKat589
Summary: Have you ever noticed that there are a bunch of different Dracos, Harrys, Hermiones and such? We have! So we decided to put the characters out of their schizophrenic misery.. their alter egos shall battle it out.. Celebrity Death Match style! Every chapte
1. Default Chapter

Hey, have you ever noticed that there are a bunch of different Draco's, Harry's, Hermione's and such? _We have!!_ So we decided to put the characters out of their schizophrenic misery... their alter egos shall battle it out... Celebrity Death Match style!! Every chapter will be a different character we'll start with... Draco Malfoy!! -Crowd cheers offstage-

  


  


"I want to go visit Ha---rry" Whined Slashy Draco

"Why so you two can indulge in the love that dare not speak it's name?" threw back Snarky Draco

"Love" Sighed Angsty Draco "I wish I could love... but alas I am a Malfoy. Where is my razor?"

"Oh Hermione... My only love sprung from my only hate, to early seen unknown and known to late! Prodigious birth of love it is to me... that I must love a loathed enemy!" Star Crossed Draco whispered

"Guys quit being so bo--------------ring!!" Sugar High Draco yelled. 

"Shut the fuck up." Death Eater Draco hissed rubbing his mark

"Quiet... I had a late night... those Patil twins sure are rough on a guy." Slutty Draco mumbled from bed

"You should be nicer... then girls might stay with you!" Fluffy Draco chided

"What and be a bloody pushover like you?" Snarky Draco snapped

"I'm not a pushover... I'm in love." Fluffy Draco said with wide eyes

"With who!? All the girls got fed up with you, they don't like sensitive they like sexy." Slutty Draco said glaring

"Hermione.." Star Crossed Draco sighed

"She's just a mudblood!" Death Eater Draco sneered

"But she was a good fuck." Slutty Draco said

"Take that back!!" Star Crossed Draco yelled

"Why? It's a compliment!" Slutty Draco said

"Not you though that was offensive... Death Eater Draco!" Star Crossed Draco yelled

"NO!" Death Eater Draco yelled

Draco (from the books... regular Draco) held his head whispering over and over "It's not real... they aren't here... it's not real... they aren't here..." he rocked back and forth in a corner of the Slytherin dorms.

"Oh yes they are." Said a voice next to him, he screamed like a little girl then looked at where the voice came from. There stood 2 people. One had chin length black hair with red streaks and was wearing a pair of black shorts, and a baggy white shirt with a black cross, she had on torn fishnets, combat boots, and black leather gloves with no fingers. Next to her was a girl with spiky platinum hair wearing leather pants, a white baggy shirt with a gothic cross design, a leather jacket cross earrings, a bracelet made of crosses, a belt with crosses hanging from it, basically a lot of crosses. She smirked at him, "Are you a Malfoy, a cousin perhaps?" he asked his newest hallucination

"No, you can call me Billy." She said

"Billy, aren't you going to introduce me?" Asked other girl

"Introduce your own damn self" she sneered

"I'm Axel, this bitch is Billy but you already knew that." Axel said pushing Billy who flicked her off.

"What are you two doing here?" Draco asked

"We got sick and god damn tired of there being a million fucking Dracos!" Billy yelled gaining the other Dracos attention.

"Who the hell are you?" Demanded Death Eater Draco

"Billy not that it's any of your fucking business!" Billy shouted, then she pulled out a pack of smokes. Death Eater Draco eyed her warily, she obviously exploded quite a bit. "Why the hell are you here?" He demeaned, if he could stare down Voldemort she should be a piece of cake.

"There are to many fucking Dracos running around! So you guys are gonna duke out... Celebrity Death Match style." She said grinning. Fluffy Draco started crying at the site of that smile, just about every Draco winced. Death Eater Draco walked over to her noticing she was looking for something, "Need a light?" He asked. She nodded and he lit her smoke "So what's this Celebrity Death Match shit?"

"Basically, you and all the other Dracos fight it out anything goes... to the death." She said smirking.

"I can live with that." he said "I'll just get the other Death Eaters out-"

"No! Just you." Axel said, Billy shrugged. 

  


  


A/N- That's all for now!! Billy is my nickname... I like it better than Jane, plus that character id based on Billy Idol. Sexy sexy... I have my hair cut like that, and I'm dying it platinum ^_^!! Axel is based on Axel Rose lead singer of Guns 'N Roses!! That's Crystal!

  
  



	2. One Draco stands

Axel, here. Heehee....my turn. Well, this is the second instalment of the Draco thing. Yeah, lemme do my thing now.   
  
MULTIPLE PERSONALITIES.  
  
"OOOOO!" Hyper Draco proclaimed; things were starting to get exciting! "Hey, where did that bitch Axel go?" Billy growled, looking around the room. "What do you want, whore?" Axel's voice came screaming from the other side of the room. She was snogging Slutty Draco. "Get the fuck over here you stoned bitch!" Billy screamed and Axel reluctantly left Slutty Draco to go and suffer Billy's wrath.   
  
"Here, prostitute!" Axel sneered and punched Billy's arm. "Fuck off!" Billy retorted and pushed Axel. Fluffy Draco started to cry again and Death Eater Draco pushed him on to the ground. "Shut up!" He muttered and turned back to the two girls. "So…….why do you run around dressed and named like guys, and why should we obey you?" Death Eater Draco interrogated. Axel took a baggie out of her pocket and Billy smirked.   
  
"Well," Billy began.   
  
"We run around like this because…..I don't know. I think I'm transgender or something and Billy's just stupid." Axel explained while popping something into her mouth. "You ass wipe! Are you starting that shit again?!" Billy snorted while hitting Axel in the back of the head. "Remember what happened last time you popped pills?" Billy pushed Axel over and Axel tripped her.  
  
"Hell, I think they'll kill each other before they answer your questions!" Slutty Draco said, coming next to Death Eater Draco. Book Draco stood up; he was sick and tired of these girls and his alter egos. "Get the HELL OUT OF HERE!" He shouted.   
  
Fluffy Draco stopped crying and looked at him, and Hyper Draco walked over to Axel. Slutty Draco took a step back and ran into Star Crossed Draco, who in turn tried to choke him. "DIE WHORE!" He screamed and Axel went running over and detached Star Crossed Draco's fingers. "The battle hasn't started yet." Axel said and then walked back to where Billy stood.   
  
Slashy Draco and Angsty Draco sat around, slashing their wrists with Angsty Draco's razor. "So, I'm in love with him, but he keeps playing head games!" Slashy Draco whined and Angsty Draco nodded his head in understanding. "My father abuses me, and Mum neglects me." Angsty Draco cried while watching the blood drip on the floor.  
  
Billy turned to Book Draco. "Well, if you want us gone you'll just have to fight. Maybe you'll win." Billy said, cocking an eyebrow. Axel let out a giggle and crossed her arms. "I don't want to." Book Draco narrowed his eyes and sneered. "Oh, I'm hot when I do that!" Slutty Draco proclaimed and stood next to Axel. A minute later the two were gone and all the other Draco's had to wait to start.  
  
"Fine, I'll participate in this stupid shit. If it'll make you leave me alone, I'll fight." Death Eater Draco grinned and Fluffy Draco spoke next, while fighting off Hyper Draco. "No, Hyper Draco, I don't want to! I'm not going to play. Play with someone else." He said and turned back to Billy. "Right then, Woman of a Male Name, I don't want to fight. I don't like fighting, I like cuddling!" Death Eater Draco and Book Draco both sneered and rolled their eyes, while Star Crossed Draco nodded his head. "Love is better than fighting!" He whispered. "Oh, come off it!" Book Draco snarled. "What kind of Draco's ARE you two?" Death Eater Draco shouted.   
  
"I'm baaaaaaccckk!!" Slutty Draco called. Axel walked in behind him, fixing her shorts and lacing up her boots. "God DAMNIT, AXEL!" Billy hollered. Axel looked up and grinned and Slutty Draco got a light for his fag from Death Eater Draco. "It was a harmless little quicky…" Axel said, lighting…. well, a "Special" cigarette. "Put that OUT!" Fluffy Draco screamed. "Holy SHIT!" Hyper Draco yelled. "You have BLONDE HAIR!" Everyone looked at Hyper Draco then at Axel. Sure enough, she had dyed her hair blond.  
  
"And you have POT!" Hyper Draco said, trying to steal it from her. "Mine, bitch!" Axel muttered and Hyper Draco backed off. "When did you dye your hair?" Billy asked. "Before the quicky." Axel answered. Billy just shook her head and turned to face all of the Draco's. "Well……get your wands ready…….." Billy started.  
  
"AVADA KADAVERA!!" Death Eater Draco screamed and Fluffy Draco hit the ground. "HA!" Axel called and ducked behind the bed with Billy.   
  
"CRUCIO!"  
  
CRASH!  
  
"BITCH!"  
  
"I don't want to LIIVVEE!!!"  
  
"THIS IS FOR YOU, HARRY!"  
  
WHAP!   
  
"OOOOWWWW!!!!"  
  
"FUCK!"  
  
"FUCK? OH, DAMNIT!"  
  
THUD!  
  
Axel and Billy sat behind the bed, listening to the battle. "Well, I know that was just Slutty Draco…….and I think Star Crossed Draco just Crucio'd Death Eater Draco." Axel said. "Yeah…..shit, I think that was just Book Draco who hit the ground." Billy whispered.   
  
Axel popped her head up and watched the carnage for a second. "Hell YEAH! You go, Slut! Ow, DAMN! Yeah, Uhhh….Angsty Draco just committed suicide. Who would have known the Muggle Lover could last so long! Agh, Hyper One just went down." She shouted to Billy. Then Axel fell back and started squirming on the ground. "Dumb bitch." Billy muttered and took out her wand.   
  
Billy lifted the Crucio curse and Axel rubbed her head. "Well, the Slut is dead, so is the original. And Hyper Draco has two minutes to live……." Billy ignored her and looked over the bed. It was just Star Crossed Draco and Death Eater Draco dueling.   
  
"You take it back!" Star Crossed Draco screamed. "NO!" Death Eater Draco screamed back. "I'll make you rue the day you besmirched the one I love!" Star Crossed Draco called and brought his wand up. Before Death Eater Draco could bring his up to level, Star Crossed Draco had dealt his curse.  
  
"Avada Kadavera!" Star Crossed Draco whispered and Death Eater Draco fell to the ground. Star Crossed Draco smiled evilly and turned to Billy and Axel. "Do you know the password to the Gryffindor Common Room?" He asked and Billy and Axel looked at each other. "Snout Snufflers." Axel said and Star Crossed Draco ran out of the room.  
  
"I'm coming, my love!!"   
  
Axel and Billy stood there and looked at the mess of bodies. "This'll be hard to explain." Axel said. Billy nodded her head. "That's why we won't be here any longer."  
  
Axel's Note: So, now that I have beautiful blond hair, and there is only one Draco……we will have another character duke it out. Weeee! ::Pops some pills into her mouth:: See you there. 


End file.
